Journal
Just say no. I hear this a lot from leadership coaches. Know when to say yes and when to say no. Is your NO— really NO? Will leaving the door cracked lead to compromise and a warped journey? Do you fear that the exit sign will lead to emptiness and abandonment?
Be careful who and what you are listening to and how you’re being manipulated!
When I was growing up, I was taught the song, “Be careful little ears, feet, hands what you hear, for the Father up above is looking down in love, (His grace is unending) so be careful little (ears, tongue, feet) what you hear, say, do.” Maybe we should add “mind” to the song?
Your mind and thoughts affect your heart and passions, and your passions affect your choices (a.k.a. your hands and feet). Subversive messaging seeps into subconscious minds and affects choices. We often listen to the people who are telling us what we “want” to hear and not what we “need” to hear. Our ears hear the message, but are we discerning the right message? I give my family instructions daily that never seem to get carried out correctly because they often hear something different, or, frequently, only what they want to hear. The greatest mistake we make is the assumption that communication has been acted on correctly. Cultural influences send us thousands of media messages daily on multiple platforms, and in our 24/7 overbooked lives, we get beaten down and manipulated by the constant noise affecting our choices. Often it comes in first with a dribble – a slow drip – until we realize we have been overcome with a flood and been “hooked, line, and sinker.”
Exit. Get off the hamster wheel, put down your screen, and get off social media.
In artistic careers, it’s not easy to let go of what we set out to do creatively. Passions blind us to messages and signals we should be paying attention to, and we often push relentlessly harder, not willing to give up our dreams. Slammed doors, scripts unsold, auditions never booked, or projects never made create insecurity and depression, leading to desperation. And no one wants to hire or be around desperate artists. Could we have truly heard God’s voice? Is He listening to our prayers, laments, and wails? Could it be that we need to stop and listen to what we need to hear, rather than what just sounds good? The “NO’s” we face are perhaps a place where we can consider exiting the hamster wheel of striving. Are we listening to God’s voice and fishing on the right side of the boat? In Peter’s moment of insufficiency, Jesus told him to cast his net to the other side of the boat. Peter listened, trusted Jesus, and was rewarded not only with physical fish for that moment, but with a whole new direction for his life. (more…)
Inner Views
How can you wisely discern what to give your ‘yes’ and ‘no’ to? It can feel like a tightrope of expectations and motivations, but Baton Rouge Chapter Director and award-winning television show host Beth Townsend makes it simple. Read this month’s INNER VIEW as she dives into what it means to find your purpose!
BIO
Beth is an author, speaker, award-winning TV show host, and purpose coach. On her own at 17 years old, Beth had no choice but to go to work. Starting as a property manager in Virginia, she climbed the corporate ladder and became a young executive working as VP of Operations for a real estate company in Atlanta. Beth kept asking one question, “How did you know your purpose?” The depth of the question led her on a spiritual journey which led her to becoming a purpose life coach, writing an award-winning book, Life on Purpose, and her award-winning TV show, Life on Purpose. “Purpose is a mindset where passion lives, faith thrives, and God’s will is accomplished in the life of every Believer.”
Beth is excited to be leading Influence Women Baton Rouge as the chapter director, which launches on January 27th. You can find out more about Beth at bethtownsend.com, where she is changing the world one story at a time!
INNER VIEW
Kathleen Cooke: We are thrilled that you will be leading Influence Women Baton Rouge’s chapter group. Your driving focus in your life is for women to know their purpose. What’s the one thing that you want to tell women about finding their purpose?
Beth Townsend: To ask and answer this question: Who Are You? We are human beings, not human doings. If you know who you are, you’ll always know what to do. Learning to have a strong sense of identity is a learned skill based on the knowledge of who God says we are, not who we ‘feel’ we are or who others say we are. Once we dig deep into our sense of who God created us to be apart from the roles and relationships, we learn that a better me means a better we. The me affects all the we’s! A life of purpose is the result of a strong sense of self. Do you like yourself? Are you for you? God has a plan and a purpose for your life.
Kathleen: You’re constantly juggling speaking, writing, and hosting your TV show. What have you learned about prioritizing your time to make it all happen?
Beth: One of the purpose principles that I live by is to ‘know my “nots.” Many people do a little bit of a lot of things, mostly in the pursuit of trying to ‘find’ purpose, and they are afraid that they will miss that one big thing. This leads to confusion as opposed to clarity. “Where are you, God?” We will often have to say no to people to say yes to God. “No, thank you” is a complete sentence. Colossians 3:23 is quick to clear up confusion. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” Before we say yes to anything, we need to honestly ask ourselves, “Will I do this for the Lord?” And with excellence? Give it all I’ve got? Otherwise, it’s a not. We are not called to mediocrity ever. Your commitments must reflect that commitment to the Lord. He gets only our best.
Kathleen: We are living more and more in a world of uncertainty. How have you learned to break through the fear and go for it?
Beth: Better voices lead to better choices. If I’m not hearing from God, I’m listening to the wrong voices. Certainly, others can add wisdom and offer encouragement. God just used to be one of the opinions that factored into my decisions, and I was about running in circles. Been there, done that, and didn’t like it. We live in a loud and noisy world where everyone has an opinion. Don’t fall for the noise. God planted within us all we need to be us. We seek Him, and then others can add. He made us and knows us, and He must be allowed to lead us. “Seek first his Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you.” Matthew 6:33. If we don’t put our firsts first, what follows will be frustration and a lack of understanding of who God is and, therefore, who we are.
Kathleen: God tells us to go and be an influence in the world. Why is this important?
Beth: I’ve been interviewing people since 2001, many well-known. Athletes, politicians, celebrities, and ordinary people who are doing extraordinary things. Not one of them ever asked for anything in return; they simply wanted to share their story for God’s glory. We can change the world, one story at a time, but we must be willing to share that story. To do that effectively in today’s soundbite world, we plan and prepare for that magical moment. How? We do what movie producers and book editors do: we edit and edit some more! Start with a defining moment, and fill in the blanks. Sharing your story starts with preparing your story. I once heard a professional editor say, “No one wants to hear your life story.” That is true, but I’ve since learned a valuable lesson on timing. “While no one wants to hear your life story, everyone wants to hear how your life story can help their life story right now today.” With the advancement of technology, we are all influencers! Be ready. Share your story for God’s glory, but take time to do so with excellence.
Journal
I was late and had run to my college dorm room to grab a book for my next class when the landline phone rang (no cell phones back then). He said his name was “Phil” and he had a couple of tickets to a concert that weekend and did I want to go? When I heard the name of the rock band performing, I couldn’t say “yes” fast enough. But I was in a desperate hurry and told Phil to call me back with the details and quickly hung up. As I did, a sinking feeling suddenly hit me.
I had gotten to know a Phil during college registration day, and it was only after hanging up that I realized what I had done. That wasn’t the Phil I knew. He was a different Phil! I had sat next to another Phil at a chapel service the week before, and it was that Phil who called! Horrified, I turned to my roommate standing there and said, “Oh no, I think I’ve just accepted a date with a guy I don’t know.”
Little did I know this blind date would be my forever husband, my prince, and the love of my life. God knew it, and I believe orchestrated my lack of attention to insert Phil Cooke into my life. (more…)
