BIO
Gloria Stella is a film producer, content creator, author, and speaker who has served in pastoral and mission ministries for the last decade. She has produced several independent productions – most notably, producing and co-directing the 2020 feature film, “Tulsa” starring John Schneider. Gloria and her husband, Robert Stella, founded En’val Entertainment in 2013. En’val is currently in development and pre-production for several projects, including the feature drama “Unforgivable,” the animated feature “Misfits,” and the episodic drama “Streiker” based on Robin Hardy’s bestselling trilogy. In addition, Gloria and her husband have released several books, including their latest, “I Can’t Help the Way I Feel?” She lives near Atlanta with her husband and their three children.
INNER VIEW
Kathleen Cooke: One of the most challenging aspects of working in media, entertainment, music, and the arts is its unpredictability. What has God taught you about trusting Him when you feel you are losing it?
Gloria Stella: That I’m not in control. And with that “one thing” – all the supporting revelations that come with it: it’s not all dependent on me, I don’t carry the weight of the results, and it’s not my job to “make it happen.” Before these revelations, like many of the women reading this, I was a self-driven, ambitious “go-getter,” and I spent a lot of time trying to push doors open and fight for the choices I believed to be “right.” In the process, I became exhausted and discouraged and, many times, made myself look bad in the process. But in the last few years, God has taken me on a journey to show me He’s truly in control. If He wants a door to be open or a specific decision to be made – He is perfectly capable of making that happen. He doesn’t need me to fight to do it on His behalf. When this revelation moved from head knowledge to the core of my identity, all the stress and burdens from a striving and fighting lifestyle were lifted entirely. Now, the only thing I strive for is more of God – a personal and intimate relationship with Him. I’m diligent in doing my part and making the best choices I know to make, and I certainly make my opinions known. But I have learned that if I’m hitting a brick wall, I need to sit back and take it to God in prayer. Either it turns out not to be as catastrophic as I had imagined, or God is able to orchestrate His will without my intervention. At the end of the day, it’s God’s project, not mine, and He knows how to handle it.
Kathleen: Often in the industry, we get hurt along the way. What have you learned about needing to forgive and move on?
Gloria: Hurt people, hurt people. Whether someone is falsely accusing me, taking advantage of me, taking credit for my work, betraying me, bulldozing me, or anything in between – these behaviors either come directly from a hurt in that person’s life or a “personality trait” that comes indirectly from an emotional injury in their past. No one is perfect, especially in a high-stress industry where most are highly passionate. Each person’s injury usually finds its way to the surface. I have found that the way I keep my heart pure and free of bitterness is to remember that I have hurt people too – not maliciously, but simply out of my immaturity, ignorance, insecurities, and brokenness. And this is true of almost everyone – including those that have hurt me. I remind myself that most people are not trying to be evil maliciously; they are just trying to figure things out. Sometimes, they go about it the wrong way. They make mistakes and are trying to fill a void in themselves that perhaps they aren’t even aware of. But I find that when I remove myself from being the victim in these hurtful situations, I’m able to extend forgiveness and grace to others. I often go beyond that and see them how God sees them and speak life into the person God created them to be, even amid their hurtful actions. When I’m wronged, I can choose to either respond to that person’s hurtful behaviors – which usually results in condemnation, accusation, defense, and hostility or I can choose to speak to the source of why that behavior exists (hurt/immaturity) – which usually results in compassion, grace, gentle instruction, love, and encouragement.
Kathleen: Relationships are essential in building a vibrant career. How have you built significant relationships?
Gloria: I’m learning to choose personal and professional relationships with people who are honest (with their motives and speech) and genuinely want to have a relationship with me or are fully committed to the vision. I tend to believe the best in people, and although this seems like a positive trait, it has led me to pursue relationships with people who were not fully committed to me or the vision, and it has always backfired. So now, in my relationships, I make myself fully available and express my desire for a relationship, but if the other person does not reciprocate with their actions and the same commitment to me, then I no longer pursue that relationship unless God instructs me explicitly to do so. The same is true professionally. There have been people I chased to be a part of my team, and although they were “willing,” their lack of commitment to the vision often manifested in their attitude. This ultimately affected their quality of work and the quality of work of others around them. I have learned to choose to invite someone onto my team who might be less experienced but who has an “all-in” attitude, believes in the vision, and is willing to spend the extra time to learn rather than the expert who is doing me a favor. I believe this is a spiritual principle. God is far more pleased with the widow and her small offering than He is with the experienced elite and a large offering. I want to surround myself with people who have a heart like the widow, even if they don’t have as much to offer on the surface.
Kathleen: What have you learned about influencing others?
Gloria: The biggest thing I’ve learned about influence is that it’s caught, not taught. There’s certainly nothing wrong with instruction. It’s something that I’m passionate about. But what I have found influences people more than what I’m trying to teach them is the opportunities they have to see how I live what I preach. Unfortunately, the biggest opportunities for this kind of influence don’t usually happen when I’m succeeding. It happens when I’m failing, when I’m betrayed, when someone disappoints me, or when someone attacks me. How I handle these situations is what really leaves an eternal impact on people’s lives. When someone is able to experience or observe God’s love and grace through me, that’s when they walk away with something that will produce eternal fruit.
Follow Gloria on Instagram at @thegloriastella for more edifying content.
Headshot by Amanda Hamlin Photography.